Conflict is all around us. With every passing day, conversations around divisive topics seem to be more toxic and less productive. The latest, tragic school shooting has brought the issue of gun control, gun rights, and gun safety into the forefront. But it’s not just this issue that brings out conflict and ultimately the worst in people. Pick any topic and you’ll see corrosive discourse happening daily. And it’s not just in the anonymous annals of social media. People seem more and more comfortable ripping “the other side” out in the open in the analog world.

But there could be a better way.

I’ve been told my book The Savage Leader includes too many sports stories. Given that, why not double down and write an entire article about sports?! In all seriousness, I believe there are leaders in all walks of life and sports offers so many great examples of leadership, both good and bad. Strip away the unrelenting obsession with highlight clips and you’ll see leadership in action. You don’t need a deep understanding of sports to see and learn lessons from both the coaches and players.

In the time since I published The Savage Leader, people have asked me to go deeper with each Savage Principle. “How can I be authentic as a sales person?”, “How can I became more values-centric as a leader?”, or “How do the principles apply to me as an individual contributor?” are questions that have emerged. In response, I have directed people to the Key Takeaways in the book and Challenge at the end of each chapter. But, I want to go further as The Savage Leader was intended to be both easy to read and easy to apply.

I am kicking off a series of posts to bring the principles of The Savage Leader to managers of teams. The Savage Manager starts here.

For some, empathy comes naturally. They are able to “walk a mile in someone else’s shoes” and understand how changes in the workplace might impact their colleagues. For others, the first step to developing empathy is to Google “what is empathy?” or “what is empathy at work?”

Before we shift to the benefits of empathy and the “how to”, let’s focus on what empathy is and what it’s not.

Greatness. It’s a word and aspirational state that has intrigued me for years. But, what does it mean to be great? I started thinking about it when I penned my book, The Savage Leader: 13 Principles to Become a Better Leader from the Inside Out. In sports, there have been clear examples to me of Greatness. Steph Curry, Tom Brady, Derek Jeter, and Wayne Gretzky. Athletes who won (and keep winning) multiple championships. Yes, they won, but it was also the way they won as well as the impact on their teammates, franchises, fans, and their communities that felt different.

I recently wrote about the benefits of being more positive. But, how do we go about actually being positive? “Isn’t that something we are just born with?”, you might be thinking.

I recently asked a group of CEOs about the value of positive thinking and how they go about cultivating optimism in themselves and their teams. Our conversation highlighted the universal benefit of being positive, so I wanted to share some quick tips to help you be more positive. The tips come from the work I do as an executive coach as well as the insights from the group of seasoned CEOs.

Confidence is a core attribute among great leaders. Confidence to make challenging decisions. Confidence to anchor to your values when “easier” and “faster” paths seem tempting. Confidence to pivot when customer needs and wants shift.

While people universally value and seek greater confidence in work and life, actually becoming more confident can be tricky. Based on my experience as an executive coach, confidence can be gained through an array of efforts such as the achievement of small wins, focusing on the process and not just the outcomes, adopting a lifelong learner mindset, and joining a peer group. The first step to becoming more confident however, is to focus on your mindset.

The ability to communicate separates great leaders from mediocre ones. Below is an excerpt from The Savage Leader that will help you start to become a better communicator by asking possibility evoking questions.

Be positive. That’s a phrase that has always resonated with me. I’m not sure why, but I’ve always seen the glass as half full and not half empty.

I recognize that not everyone is wired in this way – Silver linings are hard to see, lesson learned seem trivial, and looking on the bright side seems disingenuous. For me, I look for the good things, but I know others struggle (or don’t want to) to do the same.

To get started, I’ll make the case for the benefits of positive thinking and being optimistic. In a future post, I will provide tips to boost your ability to think positive.

The ability to communicate is arguably the most important skill of leaders across all industries and at any level. Communicate to inspire. Communicate to gain alignment. Communicate to persuade. Unfortunately, most leaders take a one size fits all to leadership communication. Complicating matters further, most leaders (and people) assume that others like to be communicated with in the same style that they prefer. In reality, people have a diverse set of communication styles and preferences.

If you want to up your game as a leader, try tailoring your communication style to the audience in place of using your preferred method. Before we discuss the “how to” of adapting your communication style, let’s focus on the benefits of adapting your communication style to the audience.

All leaders experience fear. In a previous post, I shared a tip from a Navy SEAL about overcoming fear by finding something familiar. Here, I want to share insight from therapist Dana Upton about how you can overcome fear by greeting fear like an old friend and make it serve you.

Below is an excerpt from The Savage Leader that will help you start to overcome fear.

Conflict is inherent in being human. Conflict over different points of view, personality styles, and even trivial differences like peoples’ favorite sports teams. The ability to manage conflict is critical for all leaders. Rather than let conflict overrun your team and impact interpersonal relationships, successful leaders invest in themselves to learn how to manage conflict. Better yet, they build the necessary foundation to prevent conflict before it rears its head.

Before discussing how to manage and prevent conflict, let’s first discuss the incredibly high cost of conflict within interpersonal relationships, teams, and organizations and WHY managers need to learn to manage conflict.

For so many years, I’ve set goals focused on external success metrics; company revenue, number of clients served, content volume and frequency, and of course the all-consuming vanity social media metrics of views, comments, and shares.

External success metrics and goals are important and guide our efforts. They also allow us to measure meaningful progress toward those goals. In short, these types of goals are a must.

But what about all of the goals and work that support those externally visible and measurable goals? To help turbo-charge your goals this year and beyond, consider trying the following:

One of the foundational principles in The Savage Leader is to “Cultivate Fear and Make it Your Friend.” We all face fear in our lives and in our careers. Fear of failure, fear of the unknown, fear of embarrassing ourselves in front of our peers or on social media. We all face fear, and the key is to listen to what it is telling you, turn into it, and then start to overcome it so that we can move forward.

Below is an excerpt from The Savage Leader that highlights how a Navy SEAL overcomes fear by finding something familiar.

Our minds are constantly active. While that sounds great and has served me well professionally for many years, it can also lead to undue stress and restless nights spent bouncing from topic to topic while taxing your body, mind, and energy.

What if we could take all of those thoughts, ideas, and emotions and use them in a productive manner in a way that reduces stress, boosts productivity, and accelerates progress toward our goals? Try putting your mind into first gear by using one or more of the following techniques.

What is a Savage Leader? How do I become a Savage Leader? Those are among the many questions that I hear from people when they hear the name of my book - The Savage Leader: 13 Principles to Become a Better Leader from the Inside Out.

Savage Leaders have three attributes in common and are those leaders who are bold enough to look inside themselves for what matters most and anchor their lives and careers (and actions!) to those values. In addition, there are 13 Savage Principles that will help you on your path to becoming a great leader, a Savage Leader.

One of the foundational principles in The Savage Leader is about using communication to build meaningful, long-lasting bonds with your team. Savage Principle #3 is “Forge Unbreakable Bonds with Your Tribe” and highlights how active listening, curiosity, humility, and the use of powerful questions will improve your leadership communication while also building and deepening relationships with your team members.

Below is an excerpt from The Savage Leader that highlights the importance of active listening and provides practical tips to start being a better listener. A Savage Listener.

Be more authentic. It’s a charge and aspiration for each of us. Be more authentic with ourselves and our teams.

Salespeople and other customer-facing employees can also benefit by being more authentic with customers. But what does it mean to be authentic? Being authentic is first and foremost about staying true to our values and not wavering in the face of adversity or pressure to hit external metrics or goals. It also requires expressing vulnerability, standing behind your words, and connecting with people in a more meaningful way.

I believe that great leaders and salespeople are built from the inside out. The path to becoming more authentic starts with a commitment to being more authentic followed by introspection and hard work to practice greater authenticity in your work and life. To get started, consider the following three steps.

“Do I need to have purpose to be successful?” That’s a question I hear all the time. Many people, even successful ones, spend so much time in a heads down sprint that they never look up to see if there is more out there.

Is a sense of purpose a luxury for a select few or is it prerequisite for success modern life?

Purpose is by no means required for modern life, but it surely will help you live a life with greater meaning and anchor you when faced with important decisions.

“Okay, so what’s the value of purpose?” you may wonder? A sense of purpose offers several practical benefits.

Becoming a great leader can be a daunting task. Especially, when you don’t know what you are aiming for. Most people recognize a great leader when they see one, but lack a concrete understanding of the traits and blueprint to become a great leader. In The Savage Leader book, I highlight the differences between “Traditional Leaders” and “Savage Leaders.” Savage Leaders are great leaders by definition and are focused on the inner journey to become great.

Below is a list of 20 ways that Savage Leaders differ from Traditional Leaders. Which one best describes where you are on your leadership journey? Be honest, as one of the prerequisites of becoming a great leader is a willingness to engage in honest, fearless introspection.